New Idea have made the allegations swirling around Gordon Ramsey their cover story this week. If you recall, 'professional mistress' Sarah Symonds revealed in the UK tabloids last week that she's been in a seven-year affair with the F Word star, after the pair were snapped leaving a hotel.

Ramsey and his wife Tana have stayed tight-lipped so far, although a source revealed he's apologised for putting her in a horrible situation. Clear on that? He's admitted to meeting the woman in question four times - ever, and apologised for the mess they're now in.

What he hasn't done is admitted to having the alleged affair.

So in my opinion it's a bit premature of New Idea, along with the Woman's Weekly and Woman's Day, all to be flashing about the headlines "Why I'll stand by love rat", "Seven year affair" and "Love cheat says sorry".

I'm not saying Gordon Ramsey is a saint. Hey, if the whole thing was completely made up he'd have said so by now, not being the type to mince words. Anything less than a strident denial is pretty damning in Gossipland. So it's pretty likely he did bump uglies with Symonds at least once.

On the other hand, you can't deny little Miss 'I bonk married men for a living' Symonds has a lot to gain from the whole sordid saga. Remember, she's written a handbook on the subject, which apparently makes numerous references to a 'friend' who's having an affair with a famous, potty-mouth chef.

Not only will the Ramsey debacle send her book sales through the roof, Symonds is also said to have received $300,000 from the tabloids for giving them the story. In fact, she didn't just decide on a whim to profit after they'd done the dirty deed, it seems she actually worked with the paper on the "sting". That's right, she engineered the whole thing so that he'd get caught and she'd get paid.

The other bit that doesn't add up for me is her claim that Ramsey asked her to pick up some amyl nitrate - a sex drug - for their use at the hotel. Ramsey's brother Ronnie is a heroin addict and as a result Gordon has always professed to be vehemently anti-drugs.

It's entirely possible that Gordon Ramsey is a complete hypocrite; that his drug-free stance is a giant lie and his happy home life with Tana and the kids a mere publicity stunt. It's been seen before with plenty of other celebrities. But this Sarah Symonds tart is hardly squeaky clean, and has everything to gain from all of this. Why are we so quick to believe her every word?

Still on the infidelity front, it seems Jennifer Aniston isn't done spilling the beans just yet. In the wake of Uncoolgate, rumours are circulating that she's also outed Brad Pitt as a serial cheat, and wants to warn Ange that what goes around, comes around.

NW has the goss on this one. Apparently Brad was out womanising for much of their marriage, even hooking up with a random right in front of Courtenay Cox and David Arquette at a party.

Meanwhile Jen waited for him to change his cheating ways before they started a family - but before that could happen, in walked Ange. Apparently Jen was 'unable to match Angelina's outrageous powers of seduction', which included never-fail moves like filming love scenes fully naked when she could have had her smalls on.

Is it just me or do 'outrageous powers of seduction' sound like really awesome weapons for a super-villainess? You know - the kind that has her own little plastic action figure. 'Angelina! Comes with cosmic raygun and outrageous powers of seduction. Batteries sold separately.'

Actually, change the raygun to a set of throwing knives and it's pretty much all true, according to New Idea, who have a feature this week on Hollywood bodyguards telling all.

We already knew Ms Jolie has a penchant for knives and recently bought Maddox his own set. Now it turns out they're not just to look at - when Ange gets mad, the knives start flying! Into walls for stress release, of course, not at any of her ever-expanding clan.

Other revelations from the article include: Julia Roberts hates showering and pongs as a result, Oprah's real hair (under her wigs) is short and dyed blonde so she can go places incognito, and Katie Holmes was in floods of tears when Tom gave her the order to chop off her hair.

I knew that lookalike haircut was his idea! No surprises there. NW reports that our favourite celebrity hostage is once again at meltdown point, telling Tom she needs a break. Trying to juggle her Broadway career with being a mum and catering to Tom's hectic schedule is taking its toll. While he can get by on just a few hours sleep (thus lending weight to my new theory that THE MAN IS NOT HUMAN), she can't, and something's got to give.

Woman's Day reckons she lost it recently and threw a bronze statue into a wall during an argument over their living arrangements. Go Katie! She must have taken a leaf out of Angie's book. Normally I wouldn't advocate that, otherwise the world would be overrun with pouty-lipped do-gooders with more adopted orphans than you can shake a stick at, but in this case it's a vast improvement.

In other news tidbits, Britney's dad is set to profit even more from his daughters by setting up an exclusive photo agency selling their pictures, Kate Hudson kissed a girl - and liked it, and John Mayer proposed but Jen wasn't interested. Ha! Now who's desperate?