The actress has bounced back against the constant barrage of 'Brad and Angie are so great' press to get a few things of her chest. The straw that broke the Aniston's back was her ex-husband's claims that the pair have remained on friendly terms since their separation in early 2005. Not so, says Jen. The star saw red when Brad stated it was time she "moved on with her life" in the press.

Call me crazy, but isn't he the one that keeps bringing it up?

Aniston remains convinced, as, let's face it, so do the rest of us, that Miss Jolie and her husband were getting up to some monkey business while filming their movie Mr and Mrs Smith.

Jen also calls into question the Saint Angelina image, pointing out a few years ago Angie was a bisexual self-mutilator with "a vial of blood around her neck" and, with ex Billy Bob Thornton, one half of Hollywood's craziest couple.

In the Team Aniston-Team Jolie face off, I probably would have sat in Team Don't Care, but I'm stoked The Aniston seems to be sticking up for herself for once. Sort of makes me want to dance to 'I Will Survive' round my handbag.

Brad Pitt has been looking beat since he left Jen anyway. Is life with Angie sucking all the good looking out of him?

Posh Spice is 'Stressed To The Max' in the pages of the Day. I do understand. It must be awfully hard to decide what shade of orange you're going to do your skin of a morning.

Fame and family commitments are taking their toll on Victoria, with the latest pap photos showing the usually immaculately made up star "covered in pimples, patchy skinned and hollow eyed."

In a move that smacks of maturity for a mother of three, Posh has embarked on a zero-fat vegetarian diet and a punishing exercise regime to beat Geri Halliwell to the title of Skinny Spice for their upcoming tour. Long rumoured to gain sustenance from not much more than endamame beans and steamed fish, I'm unsure what would have less fat. Dust bunnies? Cotton wool?

Victoria is "now said to be regretting sharing her strict 'eating laws' with Geri in the past." There's the spirit of girl power, right there!

The star longs for a daughter, but it makes you wonder what sort of body image and self-esteem she would pass on to a little girl.

NW also focuses on Geri and Victoria's weight wars. Posh, apparently, had a glimpse of the green eyed moster after seeing Geri flaunting her toned bod in the South of France over the northern summer. Posh "suggested the other Spice Girls lose weight before their reunion," and now she's getting beaten at her own game.

Mr and Mrs Strange, aka Tom and Katie Cruise, dote on their little girl, 18-month-old Suri, but the toddler with everything a girl could wish for has some odd habits to boot.

They make her hang out with a five year old boy, David and Victoria's son Romeo, and take her out at restaurants until 3am. Apparently she can sit through an entire business meeting without crying. I can't even do that.

And Katie treats her like "her best girlfriend." Or the only girlfriend Tom will let her have?

Super skinny actress Milla Jovovich has packed on 32kg during her pregnancy, and she still has two months to go! In a refreshing change for a Hollywood star, she's delighted in packing away croissants, omelettes and doughnuts - and even trawled a string of Parisian butchers looking for bone marrow straight from the source - a cow's leg.

In the snippets Pamela Anderson and Rick Salomon are already fighting after a big two weeks of marriage; Lindsay Lohan is rumoured to have squandered her $9m fortune, and Jessica Biel's dog hates Justin Timberlake.

In this week's least shocking news, Tara Reid has supposedly been hospitalised with a liver problem. "You'll never read a story about me going out and partying when I'm supposed to be working," says Tara. Easy to do when you have no work, love.

Liz Hurley banked more than $4 million from Hello! magazine for her nuptials in March, but still hasn't forked out the fee for the vicar who conducted the service. Karma's a bitch, Liz, and you're in for it if you try to diddle a holy man of out of cash.

Ashlee Simpson had an '80s party to celebrate her 23rd birthday and looked great dressed up like it was 1984 with boyfriend Pete Wentz, if a bit plastic fantastic. Maybe there's substance to the stories about Ashlee getting a bit overexcited over dates with the plastic surgeon?

NW concurs, running an article saying Ashlee's addicted to Botox even at her age. "She was okay at first after her nose surgery," says the insider, "then the compliments stopped and she began to get insecure again." Let's hope Ashlee knocks this phase on the head. One Michael Jackson is more than enough, thank you.

If you're into public slinging matches this is actually quite sweet, with 16-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears (the still-normal one) sticking up for sister Britney after the singer was abused by a member of the public in Santa Monica. As the woman yelled "nobody wants you in this neighbourhood Britney, move!" the youngest Spears told the woman to "get the f**k out."

Those Spears girls! So classy.

They also feature my biggest snoozefest, a Nicole Kidman baby bump, which the Weekly also runs. This one does look convincing, yes, but the Weekly says Kidman's gaining the weight intentionally for a role in her next movie. The scarily smooth faced actress has had a baby bump so many times I'm not believing she's pregnant till I see that head crowning.

Camilla Parker Bowles is a grandmother, and while all you can see of her son Tom's new daughter is a pink knitted hat the pics in the Weekly are very sweet. Although there's something very off-putting about a 32-year-old guy calling his mother 'Mummy'.

Julia Roberts is having trouble with the thought of turning 40. I don't know why she's worried - being loaded, beautiful, with three kids and a husband who seems to adore her - although, worringly, he wears a lot of denim on denim.

And, as a final note, enjoy the Weekly's report that "acccording to a new poll, 27% of Americans would like to have MacGyver with them in the event of an emergency."

Amen to that. The guy was a genius.

And that's all from the mags this week!