And no, producers weren't dangling a burger in front of the masses.

Three people were arrested and two hospitalised after a melee (I love that word!) broke out when someone screamed the b-word (bomb, that is) after seeing smoke from a passing car exhaust.

Luckily they weren't auditioning for America's Model With The Most Commonsense.

Pandemonium ensued! Which you can see here

I don't know how much damage a rampaging crowd of size-00 wannabes could do to each other. They're featherweights at best. The danger would be in all those sharp elbows and protruding shoulder blades. They could impart a serious flesh wound.

Mister Jay's frosted tips would have been spared any damage - that ‘do is built tough with years of hair product. Even an earthquake isn't moving that hairdo. Miss J could probably have dodged the rampage with his deft and nimble runway moves, while had Tyra been there I'm sure she would have cushioned any fall with a couple of unsuspecting auditionees. For the greater good, girls! For the greater good.

"We are concerned by the events that occurred Saturday," said Banks and ANTM exec producer Ken Mok in a statement. "At this time, we still don't know all the details of what happened or what triggered the incident. We appreciate the efforts of the NYPD and will assist them in any way possible in this matter."

The brainchild of Tyra Banks, America's Next Top Model has been produced in 36 different countries around the world - including an Afghanistan's Next Top Model (bikini shots? I think not!) and I'm Beautiful, the Kazakhstani version of ANTM.

But there's no keeping our Ty Ty down! The former supermodel told People mag that those affected by the rampaging mass of string beans will be getting another chance to make their catwalk (and reality TV) dreams come true.

"To all the Top Model hopefuls who were affected by the New York casting, we are doing everything we can to make sure that ALL the girls who weren't seen, get an opportunity to audition," she says. "We'll update you on our plans very soon."

Of course our own homemade version of the series, New Zealand's Next Top Model (or Noo Zilind's Nixt Top Muddle) started on TV3 on Friday. By all accounts it did rather well, winning the ratings war for its 7:30 timeslot and gaining a 29% viewer share in the covetable 18-49 demographic.

Did you watch? I did.

I was hoping for more coverage of the 1000 hopefuls from all around the country who auditioned for the show. There could have been some cringe-worthy moments, American Idol -style! The ugly! The tubby! The unfortunate! Alas, the show started with 30-odd girls with pre-approved model potential flown to Queenstown and competing for a place in the final 13.

There was Sarah, the single mother, epileptic and reformed morphine addict. There was Rhiannon, who attempted to wow the judges with a picture she drew. Then there was Hosanna, the girl who shares her name with the religious word of praise - but didn't evoke such a joyful response from her fellow contestants.

The 19-year-old barista, who drove for four hours to attend auditions and seemingly spends every waking moment practising her catwalk strut, has been edited early on to be the series bitch. Someone's gotta be, love. And be glad! The bitches almost always make it to the top three. They need the conflict.

She's already got a tongue lashing from the girl with the lengthiest name of the lot, Teryl-Leigh Williams-Bourke. Say that ten times fast!

Mind you, by the end of an hour even I was sucked in to a love-to-hate one-way relationship with Hosanna, so much so that I cheered when she ate it down a flight of stairs when her name was called as a successful finalist.

Head judge Sara Tetro used to be my sister's modelling agent, and she's definitely got the nous to find a worthy winner. And she has a mean streak, which you all know that I enjoy tremendously! Colin Mathura-Jeffree is the Miss J of the bunch, while model-turned-photog Chris Sisarich is definitely our version of "acclaimed fashion photographer Nigel Barker".

But is it wrong that I miss Tyra? Just a smidge? Although it seems Sara has. Picked. Up. Her. Annoying. Habit. Of. Pausing. In. The. Middle. Of Sentences.

And the accents! Geez Louise! Do we really all sound like that? Ut's hurrendus! Or is it like that phenomenon you encounter when listening to your voice on tape, and how it always sounds worse than you thought it did? You should hear me on interview tapes. I sound like a bloke on Xanax.

I'm kind of glad they don't sound like newsreaders though. If I hear one more of them call Wellington ‘Willington' I swear I won't be held responsible for my actions. No jury in the land would convict.

The week's guest judge was ‘New Zealand's first supermodel' Angela Dunn, a statement which met with bemusement from the general viewing public. A commenter on TV blogging site throng.co.nz had this to say about the guest judge, who apparently had her heyday in the late ‘80s. "I was around in the 80's. I would not know Angela Dunn if I fell over her grave, unless she is still alive."

It's a hoot though. I'm kind of mortified I'm watching it, but I couldn't look away. Plus, I have no shame when it comes to TV viewing. I haven't series-linked it on MySky...yet. So the jury's still out, but I'll be watching this Friday.

Will you?

Spotted

Brooke Hogan performing on stage in Miami in an entirely unsuitable two-piece...Sarah Jessica Parker filming her new movie in New York City with a dodgy looking wig on...Liev Schreiber filming Salt in New York City with co-star Angelina Jolie...Paris Hilton getting papped - underwater! - while scuba diving in Maui...Guy Ritchie and Elle Macpherson dining out together in Notting Hill, London...Mickey Rourke preparing for a role at Moscow's notorious Butyrka prison...Newlyweds Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen visiting family in her home town of Horizontina, Brazil...Claudia Schiffer, Mary-Kate Olsen, Kanye West and Woody Allen arriving at the Met Opera's 125th Anniversary Gala in New York City...Robert Downey Jr. and wife Susan watching the Lakers play courtside in LA...