Worryingly, the 22-year-old actress seems to be spending less time actually looking for roles and more time trying to flog us stuff. Her latest venture after her line of 6126 leggings? A fake tan in partnership with spray tanner Lorit Simon and under the branding Sevin Nyne.

Is it just me, or does that name annoy you right off the bat?

Buying fake tan off Lindsay Lohan seems like getting diet advice off Beth Ditto. Or picking up dinner from the Mary-Kate Olsen range of frozen food. Or buying a book on parental responsibility from the Octomummy. I'm getting carried away, but you get my drift, right?

We keep getting told there's a recession on. People are saving their dollars and cents to keep their asses away from the breadline. If you must buy fake tan (and let's face it, for some people it's non-negotiable) would you purchase one off a girl who more often than not looks like the streaky love child of a bag of Twisties and a tangerine?

"As much as I love the sun," Lohan told People, "it is so bad for your skin. I have tried every product on the market and never found something that I loved."

It was important to her, Lindsay said, to produce a natural product that didn't have a lot of dyes and chemicals. I can appreciate that, since she's always been so diligent about avoiding putting chemicals up her nose, er, into her body.

Here's hoping Lindsay cleans up her tanning act if she's gonna be a walking billboard for her wares in front of the paparazzi. She has some of the worst applied tan in the biz.

A combination of Tongan blood and skin which seems to cling on to the effects of the sunshine means I have never used a sun bed or a fake tan in my life. But if you do, would you spend NZ$69.50 on a Lohan brand tanner? Do let me know below.

On Britneywatch

Since her three-month North American tour kicked off a week ago Britney Jean Spears has been a busy girl, but she managed to grab some downtime on a recent stop in Miami where she and sons Sean and Jayden were snapped catching some rays by the hotel pool.

It does seem sometimes that girlfriend can't catch a break. It was during her show in another Florida city, Tampa, where days before a leotard malfunction and a live microphone caught Brit Brit unawares and produced a classic YouTube vid.

After a particularly energetic rendition of ‘I'm a Slave 4 U' Britney headed backstage to change costumes. It's been much documented that the singer's tour has relied heavily on lip-synching, and obviously Britney didn't realise her mic was live when she proclaimed to one of her dancers about her high-riding costume:

"Mah p**** is hanging out!"

Our girl is all class.

Click here for the vid, although the prudish powers at be at YouTube have declared you must be over 18 to watch it.

I'm pretty sure that particular slang for a lady's lady bits is not mentioned in the Yahoo!Xtra style guide. Let's just say it starts with ‘P' and rhymes with ‘wussy.' I have a pottymouth so it doesn't offend me in the least, but I'm sure the big cheeses round at ours may well have disagreed.

Britney, Britney, Britney. Isn't that what a dress rehearsal's for?

Mind you, it's not like everyone with an internet connection and a mild curiosity hasn't seen paparazzi photos of her bits and pieces already anyway. They're no shock to us! We're comfortable with Britney's hoo-ha. In fact I'm having it round on Friday to watch the premiere of New Zealand's Next Top Model.

The Circus tour heads to New York before dates in New Jersey, Boston, then on to Canada. Then back to the US, then back to Canada. It's like one big trans-continental boomerang.

Sun sets in the west. Pope is rather holy. Victoria Beckham looks thin.

Here's startling evidence that it is physically possible for Victoria Beckham to look even thinner than she does. Victoria's currently on one of her many flying visits to Milan, Italy, to visit that hunk of a husband of hers. Very brave considering the whispers from various plastic surgeons (the kind that blab to the tabs) that her breast implants might explode if she keeps up the trans-Atlantic flights with such frequency.

What a trooper, putting her tits on the line for love!

Becks, now staying with superclub AC Milan until June rather than the original March, wanted to stay in Italy so badly rumours are flying that he fronted up with three million of his own US dollars as a contribution to the Galaxy fee to allow him to remain in Italy for the next three months.

Doesn't sound like someone incredibly keen to make it home to the wife and kids, does it? But you've got to admire his commitment to football I suppose. Whatever. I don't really care for football.

Victoria's been in Milan for the past few days and was snapped looking rather unenthusiastic in the stands at Stadio Meazza on Sunday as her husband's team played Atalanta BC. Last night she and he were photographed leaving Milanese restaurant La Briciola (I would have said ‘dining at La Briciola', but I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have eaten), and Posh has made headlines for the crazy graphic print dress she donned, giving the illusion that the whippet-thin WAG is even slighter than she is.

Maybe she was annoyed with Barbie being in the headlines over the past few days and decided to give the doll's famous weeny waistline a run for its money?

Anyway, the dress is McQueen. It was a gift from Alexander himself, but for mortals who have to use money in exchange for goods and services this frock would set you back upwards of US$3,000.

Would you wear this dress if you were guaranteed to look thinner? More importantly, do you even like it?

Spotted

Cameron Diaz at a lunch meeting at the Chateau Marmont in LA...Paris Hilton and new boyfriend Doug Reinhart frolicking in Hawaii...Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and daughter Suri touching down at Tokyo's Narita airport to promote Valkyrie before being whisked into the city by helicopter...Claire Danes walking home with her groceries in NYC...Leighton Meester and Chace Crawford filming Gossip Girl on location in Manhattan...Megan Fox getting a parking ticket in Los Angeles...Reese Witherspoon and Kiefer Sutherland at the premiere of their new animated movie Monsters vs Aliens in Berlin...A thin Seth Rogen dining out in Hollywood...Jessica Simpson looking disappointed that there were only two paparazzi on her tail as she arrived at LAX...