Single and pregnant! trumpets the NW on this week's cover. 'Hollywood's latest craze.' Sure, plenty of ladies in Tinseltown are up the duff, but do you really think it'll catch on like Botox and pilates?

Some pregnancies are plausible, some seem to weird to be true. I pity the child who ends up with Amy Winehouse as its mother in her present state. Surely you can't conceive on a diet of candy, liqueurs and crack? I guess the only person it isn't is Amy's hubby, Blake Fielder-Civil, who's been banged up for the last 12 months.

A couple of months ago the NW did a story on Jessica Simpson's weight gain, blaming the starlet spending less time at the gym and more time eating and drinking with her footballing beau, Tony Romo. Jess has been dropping none-too-subtle hints about getting married to her beau for a while now. Has she caught the baby bug from her little sister, new mum Ashlee?

Jess turned heads with a swollen belly out in LA with hairdresser pal Ken Paves, but this phantom baby really could be a case of one too many plates of nachos. Guess we'll get the evidence (or lack of) in six to seven months.

"Her friends are astounded at how huge Jessica's breasts have gotten," reports the mag. Er, they were rather big to start with. Everyone remembers how Jess' creepy Papa Joe proudly announced to the world that her bra size was a double-D, and how "you can't cover those suckers up!"

Shudder.

She has already announced to Tony's parents once this year that the pair were expecting - before she realized she'd misread the pregnancy test. Doh!

Less endowed in the bosomy department, but still under suspicion of being up the duff is Kate Moss. The model's bulging belly at a recent photo shoot in Los Angeles has got people whispering. Is she the latest to jump on board the baby train with rocker boyfriend Jamie Hince? It has been rumoured that she's quit the drink in recent months.

Is Nicole Kidman pregnant again? Or does she just want us to think so? I did notice a little bulge in the belly area after trawling through the pics of the actress from the Sydney premiere of Australia and the press conference earlier that day.

Nicole is thin as a whippet. She wouldn't have a hint of the belly bloat most of us normally get from an oversized pasta dinner or too much beer. She would also know while carefully choosing her outfit that a visible bulge in the belly area under a tight dress would get the gossips aflutter. Adding to the hubbub that fact that Nic had grey roots visibly showing, with the oft-held belief that pregnant women should lay off the hair dye, and you've got a bona fide rumour on your hands, my friends.

Meanwhile, the Weekly reports that Mariah Carey's two months gone. Can you imagine? Little Hello Kitty Carey Cannon would have everything - and more - a celebrity tot could wish for.

Are super-dooper model Miranda Kerr and whiskery Orlando Bloom engaged? More than one mag's run the rumour this week, which has specifically not been denied by Miranda's rep. The Day says plans are underway for a 2009 wedding. Look at pictures of her on the catwalk at the Victoria's Secret fashion show and you'd see why Orlando would be serious about this girl. The bird from the New South Wales town of Gunnedah is smoking hot!

Of course, it's not what's on the outside that counts, blahblahblah. But I'm pretty sure it doesn't hurt to look like a Victoria's Secret supermodel.

The Day also has a picture of Czech model Karolina Kurkova's "novel navel," which was troubling me for most of last week. The girl has no tummy button. The latest theory is Karolina's navel ‘went west during abdominal surgery when she was a baby.'

I'd heard life in Eastern Europe was hard in the 80s, but to actually have your bellybutton up and leave you for the comfort of the west? That's harsh.

Woman's Day leads this week with claims of an Angelina Jolie breakdown. ‘Too Much, Too Soon' the mag shouts, with an accompanying picture of Angie, er, looking pouty and wearing sunglasses.

More than one mag this week delights in reporting Angie's supposed fragile state. And their evidence? She cried at a press conference when she spoke about her dead mother. Does that constitute a breakdown? That seems rather normal to me.

The mag reports that Jennifer Aniston's comments to Vogue magazine regarding the origins of Angie and Brad's relationship, hereinafter to be referred to as ‘Uncoolgate,' was the trigger for Angelina dropping her bundle.

There's also whispers of post-natal depression, and tales of Jolie giving up breastfeeding twins Knox and Vivienne after three months.

There's a similar story in the New Idea - maybe it's Brad's ugly moustache that's pushed her over the edge?

Of course, if we believed every story about Angie and Brad they would have around twenty kids, have broken up one hundred times, he'd be back with Jennifer Aniston at least twice, and Shiloh J-P would be betrothed to Kingston Rossdale. Okay, I made that one up. They'd just be so cute together, is all!

There are some questions about life on earth that nobody knows the answers to. Like why does the toast always land jam-side down, and where do the socks disappear to in the wash? And how does David Spade continue to score hot bird after hot bird? NW investigates.

Having entered into fatherhood after a brief ‘liaison' with a twenty-something Playboy Playmate, he's now been spotted making out with Desperate Housewife Nicolette Sheridan - and, says the mag, seeing former Neighbours actress Nicky Whelan on the sly.

Pamela Anderson, Lara Flynn Boyle, Heather Locklear, and Teri Hatcher have all fallen under his spell over the years.

He must be really, really funny.

The Weekly leads this week with columnist Sally Ridge and family getting used to the crazy life in India. The same mag celebrates Prince Charles' 60th birthday with a list of ten facts you never knew about the Prince of Wales. Amongst them, that he loves the Harry Potter movies, and sleeps in the nude.

Thank you for that mental image.

Sienna Miller's single and more than ready to mingle in the NW, just weeks after her relationship with very married actor Balthazar Getty hit the skids.

The mag pulls no punches with the blonde Brits' man-eater reputation. ‘Lock up your husbands!' it trumpets, and refers to her throughout as "the blonde black widow" and "Sluttienna."

Spotted out in London with Leo DiCaprio (who apparently was well resistant to her charms), Olivier Martinez and Josh Hartnett (who's known for being a bit less selective), Sienna partied up a storm in the city's nightspots before heading home with Hartnett in the wee small hours.

Kate vs Camilla is the front runner for New Idea this week. My thoughts on Kate Middleton were always that she's too boring to be gossip fodder - but could I have been wrong? Is she a bit more ruthless than her pure English rose looks would have us believe?

The mag says the Duchess of Cornwall and the commoner who won Prince William's heart are in a face-off for the throne of Queen of England. Camilla's in driver's seat as her hubby's the standing heir. But apparently Kate's winning the publicity contest with the British public.

Surely we could turn this into some sort of reality show.

"What started out as a pipe dream at university has become an obsession," says the NI's source of ‘Waity' Katie. "She knows she and William could inject some much-needed magic back into the Royal Family."

Camilla doesn't want a token title if her husband is crowned King. Girlfriend is gunning for Queen all the way! And she's getting an attitude to match if reports that "her once easygoing personality has given way to a diva attitude as she strives for a royal supremacy" are to be believed.

"I'm not ginger - I'm auburn!"

- He may be young, posh and loaded, but it sounds like Prince Harry's got some facts to face.