Sultry Transformers starlet Megan Fox is doing little, if nothing, to dispel the rumours that she's a wannabe Angelina Jolie. In the October issue of American GQ magazine, Fox bags out the Disney Corp, spills on a lesbian infatuation (with a Russian stripper called Nikita) and why it's cool to grab your boyfriend's bits and pieces out in public.

"My publicist is going to hang herself knowing what I've told you," she tells the mag. "She's going to quit the business and open a taco stand."

On her roles: "I don't want to be famous right now. I've done one movie. And it's not a movie I want to stand on as far as acting ability goes. I mean-I'm not going to win an Oscar anytime soon. I'm not Meryl Streep."

On that other reckless, tattooed actress who looks a lot like her: "I don't even consider her human; she's like a superhuman goddess."

On her girl crushes: "Look, I'm not a lesbian - I just think that all humans are born with the ability to be attracted to both sexes. I mean, I could see myself in a relationship with a girl - Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands. She's mesmerizing. And lately I've been obsessed with Jenna Jameson, but.... Oh boy."

On the birds and the bees: "I should be able to talk about sex the same way any man can," she says. "Women are supposed to be beautiful, we're supposed to be sexy-but we're not supposed to talk sexy or talk about sex, because that's gross. I don't want to play into that."

On being snapped, er, feeling up boyfriend Brian Austin Green's crotch in public: "Who gives hand jobs? Who's given a hand job since seventh grade? Not me. And who does it at a café on a public street? I touch him all the time. It's just like, if you have a girlfriend, you grab her butt or whatever. That's all it was, but it became a big deal. I don't know why. For me, touching Brian's d**k for two seconds - that's not part of our sex life. That's me playing around; you know, you just cup it a little."

They tried to let me out of prison I say no, no, no

Some people go through a lot to avoid living with their parents. Squalor. Dingy neighbourhoods. Flatmates. But Amy Winehouse's incarcerated husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, really takes the biscuit. Or maybe the bar of soap is more appropriate?

According to that bastion of journalistic truth, the UK Sun, Blake was offered early release from his prison sentence for perverting the course of justice - but he turned it down. Mr Winehouse was told he could walk free after almost a year in prison if he wore at electronic tag, adhered to a 7pm curfew, and went to live with his mother in Nottinghamshire.

But Blake wanted to go directly back to Wino's stomping ground, Camden in North London, and refused to agree to the conditions. So in jail he sits, most likely ‘til his original release date of December. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face. Mind you, it's not like Wino could be relied on to catch the coach up for visits. The missus was apparently inconsolable when she got wind of the news.

One, two three, altogether now! "Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!"

Now, let's assume the worst. Blake's mama would boss him round a bit, and restrict him to moping round countryside. She'd make his bed. She may tell him to wash his jeans, or refuse to buy his crack. But surely even that's better than being in prison. Or am I the clueless one here?

Barton on the loose in London

She only broke up with wet-looking boyfriend Taylor Locke last week, but former TV actress Mischa Barton is managing to keep herself busy in the fella department.

Britain's Daily Mail reports that Mischa attempted to use all her feminine charms on none other than Josh Hartnett at London's Bungalow 8 nightclub earlier this week. The paper reports that the "extremely good-looking couple" (their words) left together for Hartnett's hotel after Barton spent "an hour writhing in front of Josh at the bar."

Thirty year old Josh was drinking with Kings of Leon drummer Nathan Followill, who apparently tried to warn him off the starlet, saying that "she talks too much."

It's the same hotel where Hartnett was reportedly busted on security footage making sexy times with some bird only a couple of weeks ago. Watch out for the library, Mischa! There may be some extra deposits in there after that little incident.

Anyway, she only stayed an hour - which could mean success or failure, depending on your point of view.

I don't want to think about it either way. The thought of these two together holds all the appeal of a dirty Band-Aid.

Fashionable handbags at dawn

There are people who'd want you to believe that celebrities all like and respect each other. These people must live in a candy houses on Lollipop Lane and dance with the elves.

Case in point - take a bow Miz Jennifer Lopez.

J-Lo, who a friend of mine argues is becoming more irritating by the day (she has her pegged ahead of both Mariah Carey and Jennifer Aniston, so it must be serious), was meant to be the celebrity judge in the latest series of Project Runway. She pulled out at the last minute, blaming a "foot injury," but said injury had apparently healed sufficiently for her ass to head to Malibu and compete in a triathlon on Sunday.

Word according to Dlisted.com is the lady didn't have a foot injury at all, but was miffed that she missed out on a new role in an upcoming Harvey Weinstein movie. The Weinstein Company produces Project Runway. In a case of tit for tat, Project Runway host Heidi Klum and her husband Seal then pulled out of attending Jennifer's husband's 40th birthday party.

I don't know why Project Runway needs Jennifer Lopez when they have the camp gloriousness that is Tim Gunn anyway. And how much foot work is involved in sitting down, preening, and telling people that you ‘don't really feel it?'

J-Lo did end up finishing the triathlon which she reckoned makes her more famous than Michael Phelps, although it's reassuring to know that even Hollywood superstars look rubbish in a wetsuit.

Spotted: Matthew McConaughey pounding the pavements just days after completing the Malibu triathlon...Matthew Broderick and son James doubling up on a scooter ride through NYC...Lindsay Lohan at the Ugly Betty premiere party at New York's High Bar...Lily Allen on her way to a business meeting in London...Kirsten Dunst cheering in the stands as the New York Yankees took on the Chicago White Sox...Gwyneth Paltrow and Claudia Schiffer at Jemima Khan's clothing line release party in London...