Not keen?
The Day will have you believe that The Patron Saint of Singledom's recipe for success is simple sessions of Hatha yoga four times a week.
Despite my best efforts, yoga's never really been for me. Any workout regime where you have to loudly announce to a bunch of strangers if you have your period is so not my bag.
Anyway, Jen enthuses about a workout that's helped her connect with her body and learn to like herself. That, and the lack of anything salty, sugary, fatty or remotely interesting in her diet.
Read about Jennifer's favourite poses, accompanied by a hippy-ish quote about each from the actress herself.
"I love this one because I don't feel sadness," and "This pose feels vulnerable."
Bet Angie Jolie doesn't rabbit on about how her workout makes her feel deep down inside. Just saying.
In the NW, word is Aniston is threatening to sue ex John Mayer for being less than discreet about their relationship. Is being a blabbermouth a crime now? You know the real reason she's miffed that he told everyone he broke up with her.
Her name may sound like a character from The Lion King and part of a nipple but five-month-old Nahla Ariela Aubry is every inch the little lady out with her mum Halle Berry in LA. The Day and the Weekly both boast pics this week of one of Hollywood's cutest tykes. But how could she not be with a pair of hotties for parents? Have you seen Halle's boyfriend? Hubba hubba!
Not overlooked either is the fact that Nahla's mama is wearing a not so shabby diamond ring on that finger.
The Weekly leads this week with New Zealand's favourite twins! With apologies to the Topps, but they haven't brought home the hardware from two consecutive Olympics. Actually, I don't apologise. Up the Evers-Swindells!
Caroline and Georgina grace the front of the mag to talk about Georgina's getting married, their disastrous build-up to Beijing, and the unavoidable drug tests. They seems so nice and normal I can almost forgive them the cringeworthy song and dance at the end of those beef and lamb ads. Almost.
Another Olympic hero, Mahe Drysdale, features in the New Idea - four pages worth! Did you know Mahe isn't really his name? Me neither. It's Alexander! Now we've both learned something.
The Weekly goes with a showdown between ‘the top two families in showbiz.' Who'd win in a Cruise vs Jolie-Pitt family smackdown? Don't think there's any question, do you? Although little diva Suri Cruise could probably teach Shiloh J-P a thing or two, Angie would take Tom and Katie out without blinking. And it's common knowledge Maddox is handy with all sorts of toy weaponry.
"Both Katie and Tom worry that they are regarded as ‘lightweight' actors compared to Brad and Angelina," reports the mag. Plus, not as hot. Although, possibly fuelled by some unwarranted bravado, Katie suspects she can go head to head with Angie for roles. At least she has a dream, right?
In the rest of this week's Angiewatch, Saint Jolie is paranoid that her twins may be kidnapped, she's suffering from post-natal depression and taking it out on Brad, and the star spends almost $5m a year on security. Believe what you will. It's the pick and mix of gossip!
Don't mention the ‘B' word around Mariah Carey! She may be married, but having a husband doesn't mean Mimi's any less superficial, reports the Weekly. And God love her for it. "Mariah's always talking about how hard she had to work to get her new figure," reports the mag. "One pregnancy and it's all over! If you ask her about having a baby, she gives you a dirty look."
Plastic not-so-fantastic is the flavour of the week this week on the front of the NW, with a signature NW photo montage spreads of celebrity plastic surgery gone bad. Ten pages worth, people. Roll up to see Pamela's rubber face! Heather's impersonation of the Cat Lady! Nicollette's ‘Deirdre from Coronation Street-style' turkey neck!
Some deny they've ever had work done, despite evidence to the contrary. Some works well. And some belong in the plastic surgery hall of shame. Tori Spelling's mutated boob job, anyone?
Huzzah for Ashlee Simpson-Wentz! It's good to see a pregnant celeb who actually eats. She's snapped in the mag loading up everywhere from ice cream parlours to rib restaurants and Taco Bell. Word is husband Pete has put on some sympathy weight, while the mag reports big sister Jess is referring to boyfriend of less than a year, Tony Romo, as FBD - Future Baby Daddy. Jess, stop that! I can smell the desperation from New Zealand.
And that's not the only smell lurking round Jess - NW reports she has a self-confessed habit of "fartin' under the sheets."
For you food floozies out there (and I know there's a few) read up on the secrets of Gordon and Tana Ramsay's marriage this week in the Day. For the record, the craggy Scottish chef likes buying his wife knickers and drinking champagne in bed. Order up!
Sigh! The teenage honeymoon is over before it started for Jamie Lynn Spears and her babydaddy, Casey Aldridge, with their daughter not event three months old. Those Spears girls! Their lives are like a country song. Maybe Dolly Parton has some advice?
Woman's Day reports Jamie has fled back to mama Lynne after the reports of Casey's cheating, and a bitter custody battle is already in the works.
"Their relationship has been on a downward spiral since Jamie Lynn decided that giving him specific rules to follow was the best approach to mend their relationship," says the mag.
Sharon Stone has a 24-year-old boyfriend, and isn't ashamed to shout about it.
"The attraction of the younger man?" the Day quotes the leopardskin-loving actress as saying. "A 40-year-old will get his secretary to send you flowers, but a 25-year-old would be happy to spend the afternoon washing your hair."
That just goes to show her and I don't mix in the same circles. No 25-year-old guy I know wants to spend his spare time washing any old lady hair, unless he is their hairdresser.
And that's all from the mags this week!
International Emmys bring out the stars
David Frost honored at International Emmys
13 is Nicole Fox's lucky number
